When you mention the flash are you meaning the internal flash or do you have an external unit?
Unfortunately, there isn't a magical manual setting that can be suggested to work for your situation. It depends on what light levels you are shooting in and what lenses you will be using. Your camera will do a better job of working out the exposure settings for your given situation.
I would suggest trying the aperture priority setting (Av) and selecting the widest aperture you can for your lens (smallest number). See what shutterspeed you get and then adjust the ISO until you get something you can hand hold without getting camera shake.
As a guideline, try to get the shutter speed faster than the focal length of the lens you are using. If you are using a 100mm lens, try to be shooting at faster than 1/100s. For digital, which is more susceptible to camera shake, it is suggested that even the crop factor of your sensor be taken into account. For your 100mm lens you could be aiming for a shutter speed of better than 1/160s.
The problem with a higher ISO is that you will get more noise in your images. You can remove some of it with a tool like neatimage or noise ninja, but you will also lose image detail.
Is there any reason why you don't want to use a tripod?
What lenses will you be using?
Do you have an external flash and does the venue allow flash photography?
I'm currently working on a new website, but I've got some images on flickr
that you can have a look at. I've also been known to waffle a bit on twitter